A couple of weeks ago you Asked The Rabbi(s) and now it's time for the mailbag!
I asked a few friends for help; the wonderful Rabbi Megan Doherty, incoming CEO of the The Reconstructionist Rabbinical Association, (previously on campus, at HIAS, and elsewhere), and Rabbi Becky Silverstein, co-founder of the Trans Halakha Project and faculty at the queer yeshiva Svara, answered the call. (A number of other folks said they'd weigh in but then didn't, because your questions are good stump-y ones! But technically it's a Beit Din (rabbinic court) of 3, so.Our collective responses are below.
But first, it's time to...